Mustard Seed

Well it has been over a week since we have blogged. Guess it’s been a quite week. But we have also been thinking some things over and trying to come to a decision. Last Thursday I had another appointment and thought we would be discussing the next step since this cyst didn’t seem to be going away. But to my surprise the doctor didn’t even mention the cyst until I asked about it. Seems like the type of cyst that it is should just go away on its own and will not prevent us from moving forward with our baby journey….praise God…that was good news.

We discussed that all of my test results have come back in the normal range except for insulin (which I am taking meds for but not really sure how that impacts our timeline) but the kicker is that they have only been able to see 7 antral follicles on my ultrasounds. Part of this is due to the cyst blocking view of the ovary and part of it is due to me being an old lady (well not in my 20s anymore) and a reduction in ovarian reserve. The antral follicles are little dots on the ovary where an egg should/could form. Not all of them will produce an egg and not all the ones produced would be healthy enough to fertilize. So 7 is a little lower than they would like to see….12 would make the specialist happy. But another consideration is that 7 was without medication. When we decide to move forward stimulation meds could easily bump that into 12 or even more. Our doctor was being cautious and trying not to get our hopes up by saying everything looks perfect. But I guess we wouldn’t be there if everything was perfect. Of course that would have been wonderful to hear “yes everything is great and we shouldn’t have any problems what so ever.” That is just NOT how things roll in my world :(

So, here we are with my 7 little antral follicles trying to decide if we should just go for it or lean to the conservative side and wait longer, do more testing, etc., when a very special friend of my mother’s pointed out that “7 may not be the doctor’s number, but it is God’s perfect number.” Thank you Ms. Bennie that is exactly right. And it also reminded me of what my husband said when he suggested our wedding date “07.07.07.......God’s perfect number”. So 7 may not be their ideal perfect number on a chart but it is ours and we have decided to go for it….besides we only need one good strong healthy egg, right? And I’ve got an army of prayer warriors waiting to be called to action.

Lately Matthew 17:20 has been on repeat in my mind like a broken record “He said to them, '.....For truly I tell you, if you have faith the size of a mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there,' and it will move; and nothing will be impossible for you.” I think those 7 tiny dots on the ultrasound screen are probably the size of a mustard seed and I have faith that nothing is impossible for my God.

Thank you for your prayers.